Oops. . . My Mistake

For the past 4 years I have been restless and unhappy. However, I created my own discontent and sadness. I closed myself off from opportunities to learn new things and built a steel wall of resistance around myself when I left a job that I loved at General Mills to attend MBA School. I locked myself into a box and hid the key. I did not know what I wanted to do for a career, but rather than let myself explore different options while I was in school, I let my head convince me that I would go into finance no matter what. Oops, I made a mistake.

God sent me clear messages that I ignored and over time, the pain and discomfort grew stronger with each passing day. The more I resisted what I was experiencing, the restlessness and sense of loss intensified. As I walked away from the path of what my heart wanted, I felt more lost and confused. I did not give myself the opportunity to learn and to stay open to the opportunities that I was given.

I feel embarrassed and ashamed for how I was living. Today is my chance for a rebirth, a chance for forgiveness. Today I will break down my wall of resistance and start over. I will remain open to each opportunity that comes my way. I will be open to change and take it as a chance to learn something new. Today is the day to say "what can I learn from this" rather than resisting what feels uncomfortable.

I still feel lost, but I know that if I remain open and optimistic, God will lead me to an opportunity that will allow me to use my gifts and inspire me. Who knows, perhaps I made the right decision to go into finance, however, I did not go into it with an open mind. I did not give myself the opportunity to learn.

So, today I will start anew, pick myself up, and walk through each door that opens because one door will get back on my path to happiness again.