Past Friendships

They say that people come into your life at certain times to teach you something and then they are gone. The relationship comes to an end. I have always had a hard time saying goodbye and letting go of a past friendship. I always wonder what my friends and the people I care about are up to. I miss our deep conversations, shared secrets, and times of laughter. What did I do wrong to cause you to walk away?

My college boyfriend, Tim, just got married. I saw his wedding pictures on Facebook and he looks so happy. I am happy that he has found someone special to share his life with, but at the same time I am filled with a sense of loss. He was my best friend and my heart aches knowing that someone else has taken that special place in his heart that I once called my own.

Tim and I were the best of friends. We were like Harry and Sally in the classic movie, "When Harry Met Sally". We were complete opposites, but got along like two peas in a pod. He was a big spender and loved to have the latest and greatest gadgets and clothes. I was little miss frugal who hated to spend a dime on something that I would not use. He loved to spend hours playing on the computer. I loved to spend hours running along the lake shore and basking in the sun. He was a night owl and loved to stay out until the wee hours of the morning. While I was an early riser, who was in bed by 10 pm in order to wake refreshed for my morning run.

Despite our differences, Tim was my dear, trusted companion. I opened my heart to him and shared my deepest secrets. I turned to him for advice and comfort. He had a talent of helping me see the reality of a situation, when I would spiral into a depression over a little trauma. He knew how to make me smile. I never wanted to date Tim because I knew if we didn't work out, I would lose my best friend.

Tim and I broke up over 4 years ago and as I expected, our friendship ended. I know in my heart that we were a terrible couple, but I still miss his friendship. I know that we can never have a relationship again, but I will always hold a special place in my heart for him. If he ever needs a friend, a sympathetic ear, or a good laugh, I will be here for him. I always hold a place in my heart for my friends, even those who have gone away, and I hope that someday, God will send them back into my life and if he does, I will welcome them with open arms.